The Man in the Mirror: Reflections on an Old Year By Susan C. Troth

I have a love/hate relationship with mirrors.  I love to look at them and primp – hair, makeup, style. When I was a little “tomboy,” I would roughhouse all week, but come Saturday night, my Mom would wash my hair for church and I would strut on the sidewalk wearing my sponge curlers for all to see.  I loved getting dressed up for church.  I still like to have my “trashy” days while looking forward to dressing up.   I’m a little bit dirty and a little bit of a fashion queen.  I bet that’s why the little boy next door dared to plant a kiss on me at the tender age of five!

But I also hate to look at mirrors and really see the flaws that are staring back at me.  Wrinkles, weight, and wounds – oh my!

The holiday season allows us opportunities to look into the mirror of life.  We see reflections of the past year – who we have been, who we are, and, if we are fortunate, who we can become.  These images echo into our past and influence our present, much like social media reels have influenced me to fall in love with huskies and screaming goats.  Reflections can also teach us if we are wise enough to pause and heed their shiny voice

Mind the gap – I love going to London to see the sights, shop the stores, and ride the subway.  The slogan, “mind the gap,” is a warning to pay attention to an important difference – the space between the platform and the train.  This same warning can help us as we reflect on the gaps in our holiday gatherings.  There are people missing from the picture – gaps in our normal gatherings.  In one family gathering, we took a generational picture on the stairway and my parents’ entire generation is no longer living.  My husband and I were just talking about how we are at an age at which it is difficult to find older people who will give us wise counsel.  This is a gap.  When we reflect on the gaps in our lives, it is an opportunity to be grateful for who has been in our lives and to not take for granted those that are currently present.  It is also an opportunity to shore up the gaps and find answers for a breach in your situation.  The man in your mirror can see the gaps, learn from their warning, and find solutions.

Measure the Moment –Mirrors are tools.  As with any tool, different mirrors accomplish different tasks.  The magnifying mirror will show me small, difficult to see areas or hairs.  I use a trifold mirror to see the back and side of my outfit.  I have a handheld mirror that magnifies and shows a normal view.  These reflections help me take stock of and measure how I currently look.  When we finish a busy holiday season it is good to take stock of our present circumstances.  

Think of this tool for reflecting on our lives like an ingredient list. If there was an ingredient label for my life, what would it list?  Impatient, FOMO,  insecure, greedy, sad, bitter, jealous, discontent, unsuccessful, hateful, mean, hard, liar, promiscuous, selfish, lazy.  You get the picture of toxic ingredients.  Let’s think about some healthy ones – loving, joyful, peacemaker, patient, kindness, goodness, pure in heart, content, steward of resources, generous, humble.

Measure the ingredients of your life.  What is missing?  What needs to be developed more and what needs to be removed?  The man in the mirror can measure the ingredients and make changes.

Manage to Prosper – My brother reminded me of a particularly important mirror – the rear-view mirror.  It is especially useful because you can simultaneously see what is behind you while viewing what is in front.  I don’t know about you, but I need situational awareness.  I love all the new safety features in cars and I openly tell people that I gladly receive all of the help.  The man in the mirror will be wise to receive help for situational awareness.  Am I staying in my lane?  Am I moving toward my goal or have I drifted?  Am I being distracted by time-hackers (like Instagram) or am I managing myself to achieve my goals?  Do I see people that are toxic?  Am I aware of how my choices are affecting those following me?  Am I listening to the warnings?  Are there people who ca honestly speak into my life to help me see my situation?  

This year my husband and I were driving in Costa Rica on a major highway that was a two-lane road.  As the navigator, I was perplexed by Google Maps directing us to turn off the highway for about a mile and take a road that ran parallel to the highway but was through a town.  I told my husband we should ignore the direction because it was probably Google Maps just saving us 30 seconds.  When we got to the turn, we quickly realized that google maps was correct – the highway became a one-way street for a mile!  If we had totally ignored the warning, we would have driven into traffic.  Fortunately, we reacted quickly, turned off the road, and barely avoided a collision.

The man in the mirror needs to manage every direction of our lives and all at once.  We need to manage those following us and evaluate past decisions, manage distractions from beside us and stay in our lane to accomplish our goals, and manage the road in front of us while heeding warning signs.

Mirrors need to be polished and cleaned.  Sigh.  It’s another love/hate relationship – I need to use this tool, but in order for it to be effective, I need to keep my mirrors clean.  A clean reflection on this past year will help us mind the gaps in our lives, measure our present, and manage our situational awareness so we can step into the new year confident that our man is looking good and ready to perform at peak capacity.

It will be so nice to hear from you this new year, so drop me a note here: https://susantroth.com/contact-susan

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